"Hey there you are, I've been waiting for you - welcome to my website!" - ePster.

Yes, I know, your name wasn't on my exclusive guest-list and my security people had to make allowances to let you in, but now you're here you may as well make yourself at home. The bathroom is over there, take the time to fix your face - I'm afraid my staff can be a little, err, "hands on"; good job I stepped in when things were getting a little ugly back there. Go get yourself a drink, spread yourself around, Brad and Angelina are over by the pool, Clooney and Cruise are in the Casino taking Connery to the cleaners, Jagger is warming up with Bowie and Madonna; I think you'll enjoy yourself, just don't touch the Van Goghs I've just had them re-touched. Sorry, must dash, Catherine Zeta-Jones has just blown chunks over Bryan Ferry's keyboard.
 
 

Domestic pets becoming addicted to the internet!

New studies from Sunderland Polytechnic's special animal behavioural unit have exposed a worrying daytime trend amongst man's best-friend - the jealous little furry fellows have only learned to surf for themselves; and they've not yet learned how to cover their sordid tracks!

                  Bad dog, naughty dog, go to your kennel!

Where are Shaggy and Scooby when you need them?

Spooky Ghost freaks out Baseball Crowd!

American Baseball fans were electrified with fear at a recent game when a terrifying ghoul took to the crease.

The apparition proved to be quite a useless batsman and stormed off for more creepy adventures elsewhere when the crowd started booing it!   

Incidents of feline top shelf addiction on the increase! 

Unable to work their master's laptops with their non opposing thumbs, Cat's have started to leaf casually through the lingerie section of the Littlewoods catalogue.

Owners please beware - don't let your innocent little kitty follow their canine cousins on their downward spiral of depravity!

 

 

                        Bad kitty, naughty kitty, go to your basket!